On a Friday in June–some of the best kinds of Fridays are in June–we found out that I am pregnant again. Then, I promptly vomited, as if, now that it was official, I officially had symptoms.
This baby, unlike Ailey, is not a surprise. Ailey is almost two, and though we were completely unprepared for her to make her grand entry into our family when she did, we’ve always wanted to have our kids be close in age. Built in play-mates and learning to share by necessity and all of the things that come with close siblings sound like a dream.
So, here we are, actually doing the family thing, even if we feel like imposters, technically too inexperienced for the gig. I’m still waiting for Some Authority Figure to sternly demand that I present the mom license that I don’t have. But, they don’t give you a license when you have a baby, and this time next year, we’ll have two tiny people in our family.
There is often a lot of talk about being ready for babies and if there’s anything I’ve learned about building a family, it’s that “ready” is such an inadequate description of the situation. I don’t know if part of it is because we didn’t actively decide to start when we did, or that I’ve always made really impulsive decisions, but being ready is kind of a myth. There are so many things that you just adjust as you go–make room in the budget here, give up a thing or two there or promise myself I’ll sleep at nap time and mourn the loss of sleeping in while I sleepily smile at the toddler whom arrived in our bedroom at 6 am.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that motherhood has taught me so much about the realities of life and what little of it that I can actually control. I’m grateful that our family is growing and that I think I’m actually maturing along with that growth. But not too much… ;)